I went into Primark after work (which was immediately a bad idea because it's the school holidays...) with the intention of looking for a swimming costume, on the off chance that they might have some new ones added to the range since last month. All they could offer me last time was a sporty-type costume (one of which I already have), a tarty one with a ridiculously low V, or a frumpy granny style all-in-one in a range of colours. Everything else was bikinis in every form you could possibly imagine.
This time they had a few more, including two I quite liked the look of, and herein I discovered three problems:
a) if you are under size 12, clearly you will not be buying a swimming costume, because you are slim, sveltesque and wish to show off your body in a skimpy bikini. This is actually not so; I am a size 12-14 but if I buy a costume that size it will probably fall off me.
b) all the styles which are not frumpy/sporty/slutty have halternecks and stupid clasp things at the back of them, for no other reason than it probably looks 'fashionable' - not entirely practical if I want to go swimming in it at my local pool.
c) if I buy a costume with cups in a size 10, the cups are too small. Because obviously, if you are a size 10, etc., etc.
Most frustrating. I have two cossies to wear swimming but one is looking the worse for wear and the other one just isn't that comfortable. Everything else I own is bikinis (I have three) on the off-chance I ever go on holiday again this millennium and am ever confident enough to wear them again, neither of which are looking particularly likely.
Anyway, despite that, I came out with two tops, some elastic headbands in glittery shades of blue and pink, and a pair of dark blue cords which don't fit. I couldn't try them on in the store because the queue for the fitting rooms was taking ages so I just bought the 12 and hoped - I can't even get my legs into them. They have them in black, white and pale brown also. I might take them back and swap them for the 14 in the vain hope I'm not too fat for those as well, and even though I would love to own a pair of white jeans, my big arse doesn't need the illusion of being any bigger, thank you.
Trouser situation therefore quite frustrating, but I haven't bought a pair of jeans or trousers in about two years (save for the suit I bought and that only just fits) so I have no idea what size I am any more. Apparently not a Primark 12. Which is another thing, I wish they'd get onto this 'new fitting system' they keep going on about and abolish the sizing system so there's some consistency. I can be a 10 to 14 depending on where I shop at any given time and I'd rather just be able to say "I'm size X" and be done with it. Anyway, at least the tops fit. One is a long t-shirt (£1.50) in stripes of orange and yellow and red which makes my thighs look even bigger, and the other is a pretty smock-top in dark cerise with a lace butterfly pattern on the front, which actually suits me by virtue of hiding said thighs.
So far, that new year's resolution of joining the gym has fallen flat on its backside due to a lack of funds.
If all that wasn't frustrating enough, the bus took ages to get home and I shared the majority of the journey with the loudest toddler known to man - I wish parents would shut their fucking children up instead of ignoring them... said child pretty much deserved it when his older sister smacked him on the head, quite frankly.
BAH. *munches on pistachios and waits for oven to heat up*