T'eyla Minh (teylaminh) wrote,
T'eyla Minh

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Various Ramblings

I can't decide if How To Look Good Naked is inspiring, or merely depressing.

I much prefer Gok Wan's approach to making the most of one's assets to that of, say, Trinny and Susannah. Even the title invokes a more positive approach: looking good, rather than What Not to Wear.

Still, for a show whose entire focus is that it doesn't matter what size or shape you are, I've noticed a bit of a 'theme' going on of late. Every single one of Gok's women have a perfect hour-glass figure (or they're stick-thin flat-chested types with the opposite kind of problems; Gok pours them into some skinny jeans and the problem is solved) which he can then show off in the fashion show in a 1940's cocktail dress. There are sections where he suggests the type of fashions the rest of us can get away with, but I have yet to see a show involving someone top-heavy or pear-shaped. Also, all of his subjects have perfect legs, even if they're unhappy with the rest of themselves.

Quite strange, then, that in trying to promote positive self-image, the show is doing nothing except to promote a different ideal of woman to that on the catwalks.

I wonder if all the applicants for the show have to undergo some kind of psychological testing to ensure that Gok's process won't break their self-esteem even further? Surely there are some self-hatey types who are beyond help. (I know that personally, when I have something done to myself by a professional - hair, for example - not being able to recreate that image a week later is even more depressing than the original disaster... and I'm one of those types who looks in the mirror and sees something completely different to an impartial observer.)

I'm probably one of those people who would rather be nominated for Extreme Makeover; fixing the outside would fix the inside, rather than the other way around.

Not entirely sure what I wanted to say there. I watch the series because I'm turning into a reality/health-related TV junkie (although more so the health-related) and because it's quite watchable in and of itself, but it always results in me coming to the conclusion that every participant on the show, despite their various body issues, hasa better body than me. So, really, the inspiration is rather overshadowed by the self-esteem.

Anyway, as a result of the above, I've decided to put a lid on my New Year's resolution of joining a gym, because it's May already and we'll never have 'enough money' to be able to afford the membership, and, well, I kind of wanted to have lost at least a little weight by the summer, which blatantly isn't going to be happen.

I don't know why I bother having good intentions; they always fall flat on their arse. Some days I think it might be easier to just keep eating until I balloon to obesity because then I'd be too far gone to worry. And other days I just think "How hard can it be?" and know that regular exercise is the key... but at the end of the day, I'm just a lazy slob. Aside from that, exercise of any form is more fun with other people, and I can never find anyone willing to do the exercise with me. I'd rather do exercise with friends I already have, rather than attempt to make friends whilst concentrating on exercise.

Or perhaps I should just stop making excuses. I know how easy it is to lose weight because I managed to lose inches off my thighs and waist whilst I was ill. Admittedly at that point I was living off soup, water and yogurt, so it's an extreme case, but the fact is, I lost the weight. And then put it all back on again very quickly because I was eating properly. For God's sake, it's not like I can eat any LESS. I've stopped eating processed crap and there are more veggies in my diet these days, so it's not like I'm not bloody well trying, but the weight simply will not shift. I'm not about to live off salad, either; dammit, I like food and I don't want to starve myself thin. I don't even want to be 'thin'. I just want to be comfortable within my own over-stretched skin and not hate what I see in the mirror, yet my body conspires against me at every turn.

Ugh, I really hope this is just PMT.

Anyway. Today the team is going out for a (staggered) lunch with a temp who worked with us for a while, as she's back in Birmingham from a brief stint home to New Zealand. Despite our suggestions a while ago that we should have a team lunch, we have some of us going at 12.00 and some at 1.00 so there's cover. I doubt we'll ever be allowed a proper team lunch... We're going to the Windsor, so at least it'll be cheap.

I'm meeting up with Clare (from Uni) later at the Green Rooms for a drink, as she has just moved temporarily to Birmingham. Should be nice to catch up. I don't think I've seen her since graduation and that was only briefly...

Aaaanyway. Enough with the whining and moaning. I'll post this and wait for my lunch.
Tags: angst, get fit & lose weight, occasional feminism, ponderings, reviews: television
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