(stop reading now if you're squeamish or don't like bodily fluids...)
i keep having coughing fits. except they're not your usual coughing fits. one/two big coughs to move the phlegm, and once i've done that, i'll just keep coughing those irritating little coughs that don't do anything... except, while all of this is going on, my body is trying to make me throw up, and also choking me, resulting in my coughing even more... i've managed to figure out some way of calming myself down enough to be able to breathe in...
and now, after a week of the same, i'm starting to get a leeetle worried. possibly, it's all related to the throat problem i had a while back, which the stuff the doc gave me helped to clear up. that came back just before easter and i fought it off, but i think it's come back again in addition to the cough and is probably causing all of the above problems.
(i wouldn't worry so much if i hadn't already thrown up... twice... despite not eating.)
so, i have a choking, airway blocking cough with a possibly-worse-than-they thought throat problem.
i'm seeing the doctor only because i know i should, but i really don't want to, because i'm paranoid now that is really IS something horrible and i'll either have to take time off my course, or be put on some course of irritating drugs, or, possibly worst of all, be told i can't sing again for fear of making it worse.
because if THAT happens, then i might as well not live.
i hate my body. i just wish the cough would go away. i've tried everything. i'm now immune to cough medicine, and the throat stuff only serves to numb it without actually helping much.
but i'll make a doctor's appointment tomorrow, only because i have to know...